Drink a bunch of booze and BOOM - confidence. End of article.
I kid I kiddd. That doesn’t work and only adds fuel to the self-doubting fire.
Confidence is something that is so wonderfully tricky - sometimes it’s there, sometimes it’s not. Some of us have wayyy more of it than others, and some of us don’t have near enough.
I fall somewhere in the middle. I have confidence, but it can be a little spotty. I’ve had periods in my life where it was virtually non-existent. I’ve also had points where it’s been there exactly when I needed it to be.
It's something I’ve worked on, and it’s something that I continue to work on every single day. Because I know how valuable an asset confidence really is.
Confidence is a major part of being human. Being able to present yourself every single day to your world takes confidence. Saying hello to someone you don’t know - confidence. Not triple guessing your outfit and if someone will like it - confidence. Making that phone call you’ve been putting off making - confidence. It comes in many forms, in varying degrees.
I personally believe that the more authentic confidence you have - not the kind that makes you arrogant or ‘superior, but the real stuff; the more happy you are and the more abundance comes your way. And your world opens up a little bit more with each new spark of self-love you put under your belt.
Now when it comes to ‘hacking’ confidence - it’s not a quick fix - it’s hacking your daily practices of self love so that they build upon each other. It’s upgrading your system with positive affirmations and stillness so that you function at a higher level.
Daily confidence practices will set the stage for an authentically confident self. SO that when the time does come to be “on”, where the stakes are a little higher - public speaking, that interview you really want, or that big party where you want to be the social butterfly - you’re MORE than ready.
Being kinder to yourself, believing in yourself every day; these are the things that are going to attract good things in all areas of your life.
This is a repeat - but it is so essential, and so healthy for both your mind, and your physiology. Personally, I just sit (outside when I can) and set my iPhone timer for 6-10 minutes and slowly breathe in and out. If anxious thoughts come into my head, or any thoughts really, I simple surround them with love and allow them not to “take hold”; instead picturing them floating along their way. Of course there are countless apps and programs. I encourage you to find the practice that works for you. The point is - FIND one. Start with 2 minutes a day, and work your way up. Try to do it as close to the beginning of your day as you can.
As close to the time you wake up as possible, or after you meditate, set a timer for 1-2 minutes, and repeat whatever affirmation you choose over and over again for that entire time - with as big a smile as you can muster. Smile the heck-outta-yourself, even if you don’t feel like smiling. As you repeat the affirmation, get more and more pumped each time you say it - you’re literally pumping yourself up!
Here are some of my favourites:
I am (your name) and I believe in myself. I feel good. I love feeling good. And I love myself.
I attract success and I attract opportunity. Thank you thank you thank you!
I am love. I am light. I am fully present in this moment, and neither the past or future has a place here.
I surround myself with love and light.
I am open to success, opportunity and abundance. Thank you thank you thank you.
WOOP! I Love myself. WOOP! I believe in myself!
They are endless; those are just a few.
Sprinkle them throughout the day as well. Do them when you’re stuck in traffic, or quietly to yourself as you walk down the street (yes I actually do this, and you can too). They’re a super energy booster.
For days when Self-Doubt is a little Louder….
On days when my ego is beating me up, when I’m feeling “less than” for one reason or another, when doubt’s a little more present; there’s a visualization tool I use that I’ve found to be extremely effective.
So if you are having a day where you’re feeling less than, when that doubting voice is speaking more loudly than normal, here’s what I want you to do….
I want you to imagine your anxiousness/your doubt/your EGO, as a little deformed creature in your arms, wailing and crying, clearly in pain. Cradle it in your arms; hold it, rock it and look at it with compassion. Cradle your little ego which is now completely separate from you. Imagine compassionately rocking it back and forth, and say out loud, or in your head:
“Dear one, I know you are hurting and I am here for you.”
Say this over and over, rocking your ego back and forth, until you start to feel a lighter…
Because my friend, it’s not our true selves that get anxious, or feel “less than”; it’s our ego. If we show our ego compassion and love, it takes us out of our rut, it separates us from our ego, and puts us on a higher frequency. It’s an immensely powerful tool.
Confidence is an on going practice. It’s not something that magically comes to be for all of us. Be patient with yourself. Affirm yourself. And speak kindly to yourself when your ego is trying to beat you up for one reason or another.
Daily confidence practices will set the foundation for a more confident, happier, healthier you. And boy oh boy, you can do wonders.
All the confident best. xo